Sometimes I’m a little jealous of the kids these days when I browse the clothing store. Their clothes very sweet! I was a pretty cool kid, if I do say so myself, but kids these days are really getting it right. There are many great options for them. Unfortunately I don’t have any friends with kids so I don’t have anyone to buy those precious little dresses from, I can understand why anyone would does if they have children of their own, their grandchildren, nieces, nephews or godchildren will want to spoil them with runway-ready pieces.
The only catch is when you give someone a giftyou can’t really control when or where they will wear it… Below is a story of a mom who recently got upset. Shared on MumsNetdetails her mother-in-law’s obsession when her young children wear clothes she has given them.
We’d love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments, pandas, and if you’d like to check out another Bored Panda article about the drama between the mother and the daughter-in-law, see more here!
This mom wonders if it’s normal for her mother-in-law to be obsessed with what her kids wear.
Photo credit: Kevin Gent (not original photo)
Image credit: The Nix Company (not actual image)
Image credit: snowfall
Image credit: MART PRODUCTION (not actual image)
Later, the mother gave further details about the situation, noting that this was not the first time with her mother-in-law.
Although the conflict between the daughter-in-law and the mother-in-law may seem like a cliché, it is actually very common. Apparently both men and women report are more likely to experience conflict with their mother-in-law than with their mother, and 75% of couples report having problems with their father-in-law, the vast majority of which are mother-in-law and daughter-in-law conflicts. Perhaps because of this particular situation on MumsNet, the holidays add to this grandmother’s stress and desire to control.
Martin Daly, a professor of psychology, neuroscience and behavior at McMaster University in Canada, said. BBC, “Occasions like Christmas are a major point of conflict because that’s where people are expected to be together.” We can’t say for sure how much time this family spent with the mother’s parents or how she decided to spend Christmas, but perhaps this particular grandmother felt left out or jealous and decided to take it out on her daughter-in-law. becomes a controller.
Lisa Gordon, a therapist at Northwestern University’s Family Institute in Illinois, said, “When it comes to who is chosen as a supervisory mother-in-law, Newsweek, “I could control the mother-in-law if she applied her decisions in a way that adversely affected the couple or their children.” While gifting clothes to children is certainly a good thing, dictating when and where they should wear them is crossing a line. He creates stress for his daughter-in-law, potentially strains their relationship by sticking his son in the middle, and possibly affects the children by leaving no room for them to express what they want to wear.
Heather Lofton, another therapist at the Northwestern Family Institute, also shared with Newsweek that some of the signs of a controlling mother-in-law include “demanding personal or private information from her adult child’s new spouse,” “insisting on her presence at inappropriate times,” and “making demands and/or demands that are of concern to you”. And as for where this behavior comes from, Gordon says it could be the mother trying to “assuage her own feelings of insecurity or insignificance.”
But how should a parent deal with a mother-in-law who displays such controlling behavior? Lofton notes that married couples need to ensure they support each other and work together as a team. The controlling mother’s child should approach her first about the situation, after a couple can communicate with it as a union. They should express their concerns openly, set boundaries, and calmly explain that although they love him very much, it is not the grandmother’s job to parent or dictate their grandchild’s every move.
In this particular situation, many readers on MumsNet have shared their advice on how a mother can approach her mother-in-law. I hope that at this point she stands her ground and no longer has to worry about dressing her children in special clothes on certain days. Let us know your thoughts on this situation in the comments, if you want to read another article about pandas and then overbearing mother-in-law, you can find it. here!
Readers sympathized with the mother, urging her to stand up to her controlling mother-in-law
